The Day Ahead
We’re up later than usual today. My wife has to go to the dentist and have a tooth removed. This will be a difficult process requiring sedation. I feel for her. Considering my recent bout with an abcess and a badly swollen jaw, I know tooth pain can be horrible. She is fortunate to have insurance through her work so she can get this one removed.
How is the best way to react when someone we love is suffering? We can learn to deal with our own or some people become whining ninnies seeking sympathy but when it’s someone else suffering, what can we do?
I always say, absolutely sincerely, that I wish the pain was mine and not theirs. I would prefer to suffer rather than see those I love in pain.
Many people begin to question God when their prayers to relieve their own pain are unanswered. I do not worry about my pain. I’ll survive–or not. If not, there’s a next place, that Undiscovered Country, I have little (but not no!) doubt I’ll enter. Neither do I fear it. It is when my prayer and heartache for those I love that is not immediately acted upon that I struggle with faith. “I can take it, God, but please don’t give that kind of stuff to them. They don’t deserve it.”
Of course, “deserving” has nothing to do with it. And I don’t believe anybody “deserves” anything, good or bad. The word “deserve” implies “earned good points” or “made bad points.” In a world where there is forgiveness and ultimate love we can’t do either one. But this belief begs the question, why does ANYBODY suffer? The answer is, just because. I will not let my kids give me “just because” as an answer. I must accept it from the Creator because that IS the answer. The kids know but don’t want to say. The Creator knows but can’t say because even if we heard the answer it would not only not soak in because it is so high above our ability to understand it would forever change life on this earth, probably for everyone. If a mouse knew WHY he was in the maze he would just sit tight and wait for food. We’re not mice but we’re in a similar situation.
We must go now. My wife’s butterflies are reaching out to me. I do love her so. I wish it was my pain, even though I’d have to live with it. I’d rather live with a life of pain than for her to suffer one second.
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