marriage « The Texas Bohemian

Marriage!

Monday was not only the day my mom had surgery, it was the day my wife and I celebrated our 30th anniversary. In the early evening she and I did the dress-up and went out to dinner. I put on a coat and tie for the first time in years. She was beautiful!

Marriage gets a bad rap in this country. People change mates like they change tires. Wear one out, get another. Don’t like the ride? Get another. Performance not acceptable? Get another.

We’ve had tough times, arguments, schisms. But in thirty years we’ve weathered every storm and that little string that tied us together over thirty years ago has held solid. I’ve been stupid and selfish and confusing and probably worse. She’s stuck by me. She’s infuriated me, frustrated me, made me crazy, but I have never, ever stopped adoring her. From the very first moment I saw her, I have loved her. I shall love her until I die.

A marriage will not work unless there’s an understanding that there must be giving, selflessness, and forgiveness when the partner is not giving or selfless. We are both guilty at times of doing for self. But we have learned to forgive and stick together rather than get all snuffy and run off.

June 25, 2008 Posted by texasbohemian | Blather | forever, love, marriage | 2 Comments

Marriage and Sex

Ted takes on controversy once again.

BE ADVISED, THIS IS AN ADULT ORIENTED POST!

Ted says: Sex is a selfish act no matter who does it or where, including within marriage!

June 22, 2008 Posted by texasbohemian | Religion | Christianity, God, marriage, selfish, selfless, sex, sexuality, sin | Leave a Comment

Living In Sin…

Fornication: voluntary sexual intercourse between two unmarried persons or two persons not married to each other. (dictionary.com)

Adultery: voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and someone other than his or her lawful spouse.

Old-fashioned words. Old Testament, even. Both are popular sports in America. Americans wallow in them, like the David Duchovney show Californication.

The question of “living together” vs. “marriage” is a question of sexual activity, not sharing the same dwelling. “Living together” is an extended euphemism from “sleeping together.” Call it what it is.

Is it a “right” thing to do? Will God strike a couple down, “withdraw his spirit,” any of that fundamentalist junk, if a couple has sex without being married? These are the wrong questions.

June 20, 2008 Posted by texasbohemian | Religion | adultery, fornication, God, Jesus, living together, marriage, relationships, sex, sexuality, Truth | 1 Comment

What Counts isn’t change.

Since my wife doesn’t read my blog (except when I share it with her) I can run with this….

Going to let it all hang out today. You might want to cover your eyes.

June 19, 2008 Posted by texasbohemian | Blather | anniversary, gifts, love, marriage, wife, years | 1 Comment

About Ted

No, I am not from Bohemia. The generic definition of a bohemian applies to me:

A person, as an artist or writer, who lives and acts free of regard for conventional rules and practices.

Convention and I have never gotten along. We disagree with each other. I refuse to conform, to be a part of the crowd. I am not a sheep. People rarely understand me or who I am. I rarely understand people. Such is life.

There are people who write, as in make a living putting together words or just run off at the keyboard, and then there are writers. Writers are people driven to write, who even when they’re not writing they are writing. This means that their head is buzzing and they’re creating prose in their thoughts. Most true writers are bohemians and eccentrics. All the best were and are totally off the wall. They make no apologies and neither do I. I see no reason to do so.

On this space I simply do as most bloggers do and run off at the keyboard. (In person I often run off at the mouth. Aren’t you lucky to be reading!) This blog has been around quite a while now, too, so there are older ramblings I might not even agree with any more. There are certainly things I have mellowed out on and do not send me over the hedge as they once did. I may not even stop by here very often. I’m not so good at juggling blogs.

May 17, 2011 – I am here today. I remain the seeker. If you’re also a seeker, let’s seek each others’ company! tedgresham997@live.com. Friends are the stars that populate our personal universe… your friendship will brighten up my sky!

Ted, Spring 2011

Hi! I’m the Texas Bohemian!

… writer on occasion, thinker of thoughts, father and husband. This Trailerpark Scholar (aka me!) couldn’t draw a happy face without a compass. His gift is with words, not pictures, though the power of words can draw pictures of worlds no pen could ever draw. His talent extends considerably past the proverbial pen, however. He’s a Jack of All Trades, Master of None… well, only a few. He’s pretty damn good at a lot of things!

Why be normal?

If you are unable to resist the temptation to judge before considering all the facts and truth you will certainly jump to conclusions regarding whether or not I am good or bad, worthy or unworthy, friend or foe. Such is the danger one such as I face daily in a world where people make an art of snap judgments. Judge as you are prone to judge. It would be wise, however, to jump to no conclusions regarding my character over anything you read.

The person Ted Gresham is thus:

The person I perceive my self to be is an aging man exploring the meaning of life, discovering Truth, considering the words of great individuals including and especially The Buddha. This person is rough-edged, kind-hearted, pacifist, respectful and loving. This person lacks discipline. This person is outspoken and opinionated, struggles with judgmentalism though quick and eager to forgive. This person seeks only Truth. Nothing more, nothing less. This person appreciates beauty in a child’s hug, a kind smile, a sunrise, a soft-spoken voice, the teachings of Gautama The Buddha.

Roswell!

I am an eccentric so defined: ‘deviating from the recognized or customary character, practice, etc.; irregular; erratic; peculiar; odd’ (dictionary.com). Not only in attitude, point of view or lifestyle do I fit this definition but in history as well.

Of course a bohemian is by definition also an eccentric but not all bohemians are the definition of eccentric from their youth nor are very many quite as eccentric as I am.

Without bragging I can say I have been a few places and done a few things. The partial list:

Cashier / Clerk / gas station attendant
Air Conditioning Mechanic
Radio Announcer / Program Director
KBSN Program Director 1981
Truck Driver
Welfare Caseworker
Data Entry Clerk
Limmo Driver
Rental Car Agent
Condo Desk Clerk
Construction worker
…I forget what else

I’ve traveled through nearly a dozen states for fun, more than forty for work. I’ve lived in every part of Texas and spent time in Oklahoma, Arkansas and New Mexico. I’ve crossed the southern border on foot and traveled to Vancouver by air. And I’ve dreamed of and studied about places all around the globe.

Truckdriver

Traveler

In more than ten years of college on and off I’ve studied air conditioning / refrigeration, journalism, writing, history, political science, government, law, and counseling. I’ve attended two universities, two more junior colleges and two technical schools.

I’ve had countless letters printed in newspapers, written for online publications and used my writing skills in many jobs. I’ve made a few hundred bucks writing and written whole books that have paid nothing.

Ted with Guitar... long time ago!

Ted at work!

There’s not a whole lot of things I cannot do but some things I am quite good at. I can build houses from the ground up, fix all kinds of things, do plumbing, electrical, maintenance, painting, framing. I have driven vans, trucks, busses, tractor-trailers and all kinds of cars. I can do and have done virtually anything done in an office short of being a doctor or lawyer, from data entry to clerical to interviewing and all that fun stuff.

I’ve been a crusader, a street preacher, a religious teacher, a music director, singer, religious broadcaster and religious writer. I’ve studied all major religions, a few minor ones, and Christianity from many different perspectives over many years. I’ve been a Baptist, Methodist and Pentecostal/Assembly of God. I have considered and reject a host of religious ideas and beliefs. I am at present an agnostic Buddhist and study Buddhism.

In all these years of working, learning and traveling the one thing I have learned is that I know almost nothing. I’ve forgotten more

Ted in St. Louis

Ted in Austin

than I learned. The answers I seek are answers nobody has. The Truth I follow is one few recognize and fewer care to apply to their life. In knowing all I know I know nothing. In seeing all I’ve seen, I’ve seen nothing. In understanding all I understand, I understand nothing.

Such is the path of true discovery.

Such is the story of my life.

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